We are all looking for love! A person with whom we share our happiness and sadness. We are looking for a partner to share life with and plan our future together. I met plenty and had a crush on many but I always felt that choosing “the one” is a critical decision. I wanted to make sure that this person will be “the best fit” so we can be happy together. Therefore, I made a checklist and then changed it again and again. While dating, I got dumped and I dumped. While analysing every situation and always asking myself about the perfect relationship, I thought about the CCTV framework. No, I am not talking about the camera nor planning to stalk anyone!!! I am talking about the 4 areas that I am targeting to find “the one”!
That’s the first C in the framework! In this area, I am bringing the HEAT and the passion! Sex and Physical chemistry are essential in every relationship. If the couple is not enjoying their intimacy, something will always feel missing in the relationship. The passion will gradually disappear from the relationship and the most positive outcome would be friendship or just mutual respect. Come on, Life is too short not to be enjoyed with passion 😉
The second C in the framework stands for compatibility. In this area, I am going deeper into personal values and personality. It will feel peaceful to be with someone that shares your values in life such as your perspective on family, and friendship. For instance, I know many people that look for a partner from the same origin/country. They use to argue that they would be sharing the same culture and “I don’t need to explain myself”. As for me, I don’t really care about the origin as everyone is different, but I believe that partners should share the same values or interests so they can enjoy a peaceful time together and vibe in the same direction.
Have you ever met a great person but at the wrong time? Well, I did!! At a young age, we are figuring out our career path or we are always on the move. Having a partner will feel like a burden. You won’t be able to promise anything nor be there for them when they needed. Therefore, They will feel like a secondary in your life and feel tired from continuously chasing after you. To have a happy and stable relationship, both parties should be ready to settle and invest in their relationship.
Everyone has a dream or a vision for the future. We are chasing our goals, and our partner will be part of our future. Therefore, I believe both partners’ goals should be aligned. For instance, An ambitious person with an entrepreneurial goal won’t be happy to live with a risk-averse person. The entrepreneur will feel held back as the risk-averse partner will feel insecure.
In order to build a successful relationship, I am looking into 4 areas: Chemistry, Compatibility, Timing and Vision. All of those areas are equally essential, and none of them holds any priority over the others. I believe if one of them is missing, the relationship will be weakened with time or might become toxic. Love and Relationships are very complex areas and people could have many different opinions. Therefore, I would love to hear your point of view on this matter and learn from your personal experience!